Friday, January 15, 2010

40 Seconds

I never understood that I could be so connected to 40 seconds.

I auditioned for my piece this week, which is very near and dear to me and after, the head of the dance department told me she was disappointed as the piece didn't turn out as expected. I feel very hurt because I'm putting myself out there and being very personal with this piece. This is about my grief with my Hailey and I don't believe anyone has a right to tell me that I'm doing anything wrong.

The two eight counts I did for auditions, were out of context and possibly did look a little jazzy. I understand, but what I don't get is why they didn't just ask me how the rest of the dance was coming along. I'm also quite angry they threatened to kick my piece out because of two stupid eight-counts that weren't "what they expected."

While this was all going on, a bunch of girls were sitting in front of the window of where I was crying and discussing this whole ordeal with the heads. The girls outside were then discussing whether they would give up their spots to choreograph for me. One girl actually did, but my piece was never actually cut. Now I feel a great deal of guilt about that.

Maybe I need to be in this tortured state to choreograph.


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"There are times in the lives of most of us when we would have given all the world to be as we were but yesterday, though that yesterday had passed over us unappreciated and unenjoyed." -The Happiness Project

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